I’m pretty sure I have a really bad addiction. Don’t worry. It doesn’t really involve drugs or alcohol in any way. I think I’m addicted to my Blackberry.

Don’t even start in with a ‘You can’t get addicted to your Blackberry’ comment. I’m addicted as hell. My thumbs hurt. I don’t even really use my computer for email anymore. Fuck, if I could run Photoshop, an ftp program, an SSH terminal, and a decent text editor on this shit, I wouldn’t even need a computer. I bought my Crackberry a couple months ago, and after about two hours on the phone with Verizon level 3 tech support, I was surfing the web, emailing, and instant messaging some hoes. Oh yeah, and I was completely addicted.

There was a nationwide service outage a couple weeks ago, and during those eight hours or so, I was about as uncomfortable as I’ve been since I dropped my cellphone and broke its LCD screen back in 2001. Why was I incomfortable? No push e-mail. Granted, I was sitting in front of my computer all night, which receives e-mail fine, but since my love affair with the Crackberry, I’ve completely forgotten how to use the email client on my laptop.

I may need help, but the upside to this addiction is that my email response time is never more than like 15 minutes. Also, I can still do business while I am out drinking heavily. When I was in Vegas drunk as hell a month ago, I was sending emails to a European company I do business with at two in the morning. When I did acid last weekend, I was still able to fire off a few remarkably coherent emails to a server admin regarding a new server set-up. This thing is amazing.

How much do I love it? I’m blogging right now during a dinner. You think I give a fuck? Now that I have the Crackberry, I’m always working. I love it.

You may be asking yourself ‘Always working? What the fuck? Your blog was a ghosttown over the last month, Fat Dick.’. You have a valid point, but look who threw down two shitty blog entries over the weekend. What’s up now, bitch?

I would write more, but I’m going to point my mobile browser to some hot shemale porn instead. Holler.

This entry was posted on Monday, April 30th, 2007 at 4:43 pm and is filed under Rants. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.